What goes down in that land far east?

The frequency of which I update this blog seems to become rather bad. However I will try my best to keep it alive.  It's now late november and the weather still feels like late autumn. Quite delightfull I'd say.   I've gotten the pleasure of witnessing the Japanese theatre form of Kabuki and the arts and crafts of the edo period. Also I have spent a day in Disneyland. Starting of with the disneyland trip.

It was quite the fine day, no blue sky but not the cloudy menace one could fear. We skipped the entrance line due to a friend with free entrance passes. This is not saying that we didn't stand in line. Every atraction had about an hour and a half of waiting time so we gt our share of waiting. But what to expect out of one of the worlds most visited amusement parks? Since we already foresaw the queues we had some fun rather than being bored; our 4 DS's being used rather often. After a magical evening in Disneyland (for as you all know, the fireworks and the light parade is magical), we went clubbing in Shibuya. Long and tedious story short: we didn't get back home untill midday the next day.

Then a few days passed by before it was time for the Kabuki. Our teachers from JiU took us to Tokyo to stay at on of the school's various campuses. Or rather in this case, a hotel. At mid evening we took the trip to Ginza to see the famous Kabuki. Now Kabuki is really interesting in the sense that it seems not to have changed a bit since eldern times and thus have a lot of interesting ways to act, talk, create effects and otherwise bring the different feelings and messages out to the audience. Like using wooden sticks, beaten together in a special rythm to symbolize night. The only annyoing thing with the Kabuki is that it tends to pull the story out far more than interesting is, thus creating endless scenes of dialogue that doesn't lead anywhere in particular. All in all it was a great experience if one looks aside a suicide-scene that killed the spark of the last play. "Kill each other allready will ya!"

Lookkit me, I's da intrawebs-man

Would you look at that, two blogs in under a month. Impressed. Why? 'Couse I finally got the oh so evasive INTRAWEBS. *scary music* Japan and intrawebs, this is rather suspicious. Well, what to tell. Our movie-project is going along quite well, the script is written and all that's left are reharsals and the actual filming. Oomoto-sensei will be thrilled. Rain has finally stopped after days of heavy rain/wind, haven't checked the wind but since the building stopped shaking I guess we're safe. Next week is halloween, got costume, just need to mod it a bit and I'll be all ready to party it on, further it seems that I'm joining the photo-club in making a haunted house. Hope that will be awesome.......... Too sleepy to write more...

Jaqan suupa sutoori

Well, September came and went. Lots of stuff happened but well, moving and going to Japan and fixing Japan-stuff became very time consuming. But here I am, sitting at an internet-cafe in Togane-shi as this place so prettily is named. To wrap things up, we've arrived in Japan, as planned, started school, as planned, and made a lot of mess..... Well, I've made a lot of mess that I use my spare time to straighten up. Yay me. But Japan, the land of too many weird people's dreams. It's big, it's crowded, it was warm up untill shortly. No one knows English except a lucky few who gets to work at schools. It can get a bit frustrating sometimes but one tries one's best. My beard is getting way too long, I've been planning to shave since I arrived but never seem to find time for it, just like everything else I wanna find time to do. I find that I spend my few spare hours here or at home, trying to make food or relax. I think I am the only person in the netcafe besides Nikoline who isn't watching porn at this very moment....something I desperately try to forget as I type. Oh man, so sleepy. Well gonna listen this Regina Spektor track out, then perhaps leave. At least I'll type as long as I'm still in the place. Hmmm, things that might be of interest...... Yeah, I made a friend, or two, or maybe three. I'm not sure how many of them who'll stick. But they seem nice, some more hyperactive than others but it's all good, or close enough. I'll try to meet them often, perhaps it will help me learn faster.....or something. If nothing just because they're not Norwegians, bit tired of just seeing the same old. Nothing wrong with them, just.......yeah, you all probably get it. Bah, tired. Nighty night.

This little piggy got squished by a 50 ton monster

Except it was fingers; not toes, three of them; not one and it was in a machine; not under a monster.......and the pressure did not equal 50 tons, just felt like it. So now I've got three fingers who's not sure whether they are part of my body still or made into sausages. Swelled and beautifull. Did I mention August sucking? See what I meant? Writing this with my right hand only, timeconsuming. I need love, and pity.
Well, ending it this short, as said I'm writing this with only one hand.

August despair

August is on. I figured I hate august this year. Work, back problems, disseases, lot's and lot's of pain. If this is hell I'll have my hymen reinstalled. Hymen v2.0 "new and improved" I went to the doctors office today. Lots of anxious people waiting to know their destinies, each and every one of them afraid of the person next to them. Like the others there are more disseased than yourself. And you wait 1 hour, two people who came after you have already been in. 2 hours and most of the people before AND behind you in the queue have been in. Then "37". That's you. Suddendly rushed, you pick up all you have and storm after the nurse down the corridor, the longest corridor there ever was. And the doctor tells you to strip.... Strip. I'm too bloody shy to be bloody stripping in front of a female doctor! But need makes one mad and the boxers do. The doctor touches you in ways that would have gotten your parents locked away if they did it to you. If I hated the doctors office from before I'm all out of words to express what I do now. I must have been a mass-murdering child-molester in my past life. Maybe if this keeps up I'll consider becoming one this life? Naaaaaah too lazy.... Lazy people make baaaad murderers...Unless they can make victims murder for them. Now that's killing for ya. 

!

"Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please god,wake me"
It was about here I got my 5th chill during that song. What am I talking about? Why, Metallica live of course. It blew me away. We showed up late, for shame, and missed Turboneger by 10 minutes or so. But hey, you win some, you lose some. Despite this lack of respect to the timescedule we got pretty neat places, not close enough to smell Kirk's breath but close enough to be comfortable, and of course see the little men running around on the stage. Being 1.90 pays off at concerts. We met up with Øyvind and his master and even though he himself sped of to try to start a Mosh, his master stayed behind and enjoyed the concert with us. They started the show with a song called "The Ecstacy of Gold" in which I feared they'd skip, seeing it is purely instrumental and sorta needs an orchestra. They solved that quite nicely and we could all enjoy a beautifull song to set a mood. Then they started to play and I pay no justice at all trying to describe it so I'll just skip it. However it was great with many great songs like "Master of Puppets", "Fuel", "Battery" and so on and so forth. When they came to "Nothing Else Matters" during their "extra" I was so content. When the pyroworks fired of as introduction to "One" I was in heaven. It was awesome, putting that word to it's proper use. Now I'm dead tired but deeply content. I'm happy so to say. If one were to do one fun thing this year it ought to have been that very concert.

Watching fireflies.

Watching the fireflies without eyes
Eating the apple without taste
Hearing the wind without ears
Loving without a heart
Living without a love

I have no idea what fireflies really look like in real life but I imagine it being one of lifes prettiest things. "Sometimes I just wish to kill myself, sometimes I just want to kill everyone else" I'd perhaps say if I was fourteen. I'm not and my continous despair must be wented otherwise. Here perhaps? Perhaps. In a hundred years all that seems significant now will be unimportant. Maybe I should sleep a hundred years or so. But then again by then the world is probably destroyed by something or someone. I'm afraid of dying, not because it's painfull or anything, I just don't want to end this. Once I considered killing myself because I was so afraid of death that it hurt. Kind of paradocsal huh? Made perfect sense at the time, and probably the only reason why I didn't do it was uncertainity. A faint belief in christianity or something similar. That doesn't exist anymore, nor has it for many years. I've stopped thinking of killing myself, but never stopped fearing death. I seldom cry anymore though, perhaps I'm getting used to the idea? "There are worse things than death," they say, "I'd like to see that," I'll reply then. Perhaps they at one point finds a way to conserve what is the human mind in some sort of computer? I'll buy me one of those, or anything other offering immortality.....This sure was cheerfull, and this is why I should stop writing when depressed......

Complain complain complain

I know this will be a bit emo but I came to realize a couple of things I hate in myself. I'll just start the bullshit then. Firstly I love way to much. Meaning that I love too quick, too much and too long, and it often causes a lot of unnescesary pain. I am tired of still longing for persons I now despise, I am tired of thinking of people I barely see, or know for that matter. I just want to be happy with the one I wish to be happy with, is that too much to ask for? It is not only in the love section I feel way to much but the other feelings doesn't bother me that much. No other feeling next to sadness brings just that much, well, sadness. It sucks and it's probably the base to most of my depressions.

There, that was one thing I hate with me, the other is my foolish tendency to measure myself up to people way smarter than me. That is sort of twice annoying as I then hate myself for beeing worse than what seems like everyone else, and it makes me hate myself for hating myself for it. I did manage to find what most likely is the reason for it though. All my cousins and siblings are successfull in what they do, having studied things like law, bioengineering, computer science. And then of course it's the ones beeing able to brag about stuff like, army officer, winner of the norwegian dancing championship etc etc. What do I have to show of my life? Well, average grades, halfway in a seemingly wasted bachelor and a solid mess of everything I've ever tried to do. Comparing with morons would probably remove this feeling of myself beeing a failiure....

I think I need some outside love.

What happened since last I wrote.

Hi everybody! Lots of stuff happened since the last time I took the time to sit down and write. Firstly, I've passed my exams with a C on both. Not great but not very bad either. Had a blackout party in honor of Azusa again, ended in blackout and a promise to myself to try to stay away from booze. At least in drinks I mix for myself. After all that we went on the long awaited Prague-trip. It was great fun and even though there were some bickering it was not really more than expected. Being so close to 3 other individuals for 8 days is a sure bet for annoyance. We saw a lot and experienced a lot worth remembering. Coming right back and into work. It's boring and my back aches like a nightmare but it brings in the bucks and thus I'll survive. That's the quick status update. Almost a month summed up in a flash.

Ughar in the evening

Only the oral japanese left now.... if I passed the written that is. Nervous, very nervous. Well, I've taken up FFXII again, partly to calm me down, partly cuz I won't have PS in Japan if I get there. I'm wondering what I might do if I actually fail, I've tried very hard not to get my anticipation up just in case, but it is damn hard when there is such a thing at stake. And even if I get my dreams fulfilled and get to go to Japan there's things going on here I'd rather not miss like my mom's 50th birthday. Who'd ever want to miss such a thing? So these days before I know for sure if I go or not are so loaded with contradicting feelings that I'm quite worried if I will burst or not.... Though something in me tells me that I did quite well on the exam, so perhaps the outcome is as expected? I'll have to admit that I halfway expect that I'll have no problems passing. I've allready achieved worse than I'd want myself to by having done bad enough to doubt whether I'll pass or not... My god I sound full of myself. I must eat something soon....

Morning dew and pitch black coffee stains

I am awake, why am I awake? What have I done to deserve this? This is the third time this week I'm up before nine in the morning, heck, up before 8 even. I must be sick, some sort of responsibility-gland that's not supposed to work has started up or something? It's torture I tell you all! *smashing head in keyboard to make funny button-pattern* I need coffee, black like the heart of satan, and lots of it. My mom would have been proud of me if she knew, she'd show a spoonfull of porrige into my mouth and say "good boy". And I'd waggle my tail. Hitler wasn't a warmonging, jewhating dictator, he was just an illusionary with a slight paranoia and some strange people-issues.... No wait. See what too much coffee does, that and complete and utter lack of snuggling? In which I could have given myself if I slept now. Utilitarism has taken steps to try to protect the rights of women, animals and trees, it's about time it stands up to the people who want's to sleep till noon. By a general estimate, all would be a lot happier if I could do that every day, thus if that is done, and I am right, it would be a morally right thing to do right? This is still the coffee talking by the way, coffee and my latest exam. Of which I by the way hope I passed. Though I only sat there half and hour, and about half that time I tried to doodle the Kei(from keisatsu)-kanji on the little yellow note I got. Bored? NEVER! Not as long as there is 3000(?) kanji and I know like 5 of them. Aaaaah, I just love these blogs that don't go nowhere, makes me give up all hope in humanity once again and that agian makes me feel hopelessly young. Makes me think about a commercial for a show on discovery. They list up stuff like, they destroy nature, and so on and so forth, and the point is I guess that I thought all the time that this was a show to criticize the human race, but it turned out to be a show about serial killers...... I didn't really ever get it. Final question, if there was a bug in your cereal, would you eat it? 

Yay I write stuff. Why you say? So that the public can enjoy their tv-dinners without having to think, so that presidents can keep getting elected without having anything constructive to bring into the world, so that religious people can keep on believing that they come to a heaven, so that decapitated chickens can keep running in circles..... That sure was harsh, I should perhaps not compare religious people with decapitated chickens? Well it was a spur of the moment thing and now it's in there. Only way back now is if I delete the entire blog and we all see that THAT didn't happen. But then again how many true believers is left in the world to be offended anyways? So hamburgers, that's what I wanted to talk about. Funny meat is it not? Claiming to be pork but hey, it's not a piece of ham at all, it is grounded beef. Cow, not pig as promised. Hehehe, that sure is funny. *chirp chirp* Ok you got me, I really have nothing to write about, I'm just writing to be writing. Which is really stupid since I should be preparing for my exams. I wanna hear Sira sing again, the little bugger sings better than she wishes to admit. Perhaps I'll try to make possible a visit agian. Cloud sure has spiky hair.....this is getting very silly so I'll end it here. 

Dream

This just might be the stupidest thing to write about ever but it disturbed me. I woke up today, remembering my dream, and in that dream I made love to an ex of mine. Now that does not sound to bad? Well it sort of sets me a bit on the edge as I really thought I'd gotten completely over her, in all manners. This dream then just makes me really worried about how maybe I deep down still crave her, or worse even, love her. Now I really hope the last is not the case. That would suck to put it blandly. There are other exes I'd rather dream of, so why her? Perhaps it's time to press the self-destruct button on the back of my mind and send it of into ever blankness? ...... Having such a button would be rather dumb now wouldn't it? I'm just gonna run around like a decapitated chicken for a while.

I haven't written for a long time. I was planning to many times but it just didn't come to it. But today I will write. What I've been doing lately is fairly uninteresting, just some concerts and tests and amusement parks and, wait, amusement park is worth mentioning.

Ok I'll start of with that then. We went to this park called Tusenfryd some time ago, me, Nikoniko, Goldie and some other friends of mine. Most of the day was regular fun so I'll skip that. What I wish to talk about is the significant thing that took place. Significant for me at least as I have a great fear of heights. I took this attraction called "Sky Coaster". It's mainly just a giant swing where you get pulled about 40 metres or so up in the air, attatched to a cable, and then dropped so that you swing. I believe this signifies a great change in me, if I could do this, maybe I can overcome some of my other fears. As a final comment: It was so totally worth the 200 kroners I had to pay extra!

Back to topic, or rather the reason why I write today. Sure it is partly because Goldie poked me and told me to write again, but I wouldn't have written if I had nothing to write about. I wanted to tell you about a ring of mine, a gold ring that means a lot to me. The reason why it means so much is a bit sad though. The ring was given to me upon my confirmation, an act I by the way undid a couple of years later. It was given to me by my parents and I loved it. I started using it every day. A year later or so, as my father died, it came to mean even more as I saw upon it as sort of a last piece of him, an impression that has strengthened as the years have passed. Then this fall I did something stupid. I have asked myself why many times lately. I lent my ring to my girlfriend as a token of trust and dedication. I felt that I would do anything to make her trust me and trust that I was faithfull. Whether or not it was love is a matter I will not indulge upon at this moment but something drove me to do just that. Spring came and she found that she wanted someone other than me, however the ring was still in her care. For months I asked and pleaded for her to remember to give my ring back to me. Today it was returned to me and I must say that I feel happier than ever to see it again. Never again shall it leave my finger. And never have it meant so much to me. The left hand is closest to the heart, my ringfinger will forever take care of a golden band.

I wish I could see what the different paths of life holds for me, I am at a sort of crossroad and wish I could see how to procceed. Meh, guess I'll just cover myself in work and see if anything has changed when I'm done.

Impressions on a Saturday.

 I walk out from the darkness of an underground-station and step into the square in front of the theatre. The square is bathed in a warming sunlight that gives of a nice feel of spring. Some trees gives of an aura of life that builds up under the already good feeling shared by the people on this square. People give eachother hugs as they probably haven't seen each other in quite a while. The square is one of the easiest place to meet people if the don't know the city so well. I see all this as I walk across the stones..... I seriously need a hug.

We sit around the table, drinking steadily. The talk and the laughter fills the not to big room. I pour another glass of beverage for myself, and obviously three others as they all raise their glasses in anticipation and looks at me. I pour it up for them as well. We raise our cups and drink, the taste of honey and liquer in unison travels through the body. I'm with friends.

One foot in front of the other. Come on body, this is not so hard, I know you can do it. Ooooh, baked-potato-stand, I gotta have me one of those. Potato is really good, but a bit messy. What the heck, food is food. Everybody dissappeares all the sudden, walking of to Nikoniko they say. Well that serves as an excuse for me to put on some music. Helps getting my ears warm again to. Crap, lost 20 kroners while trying to change track. Fumbling, fumbling, fumbling, found it! The walk can continue. Oooh, grass, I can lie in that and drink Coke. The stars are really beautifull. How long have I been watching the stars? Probably much longer than I think, better call Lasse. Meets up with Lasse. Movie sounds like a good idea.

As I get close to home I notice through the wall of music and thoughts that it is getting light outside. Sunrays are forcing themselves over the top of that hill way over on the other side of the city. True enough, the stars I was watching earlier are fading rapidly as their light must give way for the closest star of the all. I stop for a short while and just peer over where the dawn is coming. It's actually quite beautifull. I can't remember the last time I watched dawn come, if I ever watched it that is. How come I'm always alone when these things occur?

Drumstick

Let it be known that as I write this I am inches away from inconciousness by exhaustion. The reason be lack of drink, food and the heavy bodily strain I have put on my body for the last hours. Of course as I am writing this I am also correction this so that I hopefully can function for yet some other hours. I'm just to friggin' happy to sleep now. I have just reached home after the most awesome concert I have ever been to. That perhaps not saying much as I have been to very few concerts in my life, however this was an experience out of this world. I am of course refering to the Nine Inch Nails concert that just ended in Sentrum Scene in Oslo. I am a huge fan andthus, seeing them live, getting their water splashed on me and etcetera, was a true kick. Hmm, starting at the beginning perhaps. We arrived half an hour before the doors opened and of course, already people had started to stand in line. The common t-shirtsellers and black-market ticketmen marched around, I think they had a hard time though. NIN-people do NOT sell their tickets and the tickets were sold out only hours after sale. Lucky I even got one. Anyways, we got in, realized that we had absolutely no money at all so we couldn't get official t-shirts, and settled down almost in front of the scene. There we stayed. A band named Ladytron was warmup-band and they did their job for sure. Espacially awesome was their song "He Took Her To A Movie". But enough about them, they were cool enough but only the warmupband after all. After the warmup I got sorta known with this guy, totally NIN-fan and really psyked up for the concert. We talked for a while and he actully managed to stay only a couple of feet away from me through the entire ordeal. And that is saying a lot as the pushing and pulling was, as expected, very intense. I worked up a sweat pretty fast, but then again, so did everyone else. I feel really sorry for the short people there, having to breathe that air..... Well, I'm tall, tough luck. During the concert we almost made it to the front so I guess I should shut up and be content about that, and they played most of my favourite songs, in fact there was only one song I missed and that is good when coming to think of it. Could have been a lot more. I think the peak of the concert was when "Hurt" was played. Man, I just, I dunno, but it was great. At the end they did the obligatory guitar-smashing and of course the drumstick-tossing, and guess what, I got one. I reached out, grabbed a stick and held it firmly till all the others were forced to let go. Not the worst end of a rather perfect night I dare say. Now I have written, consumed about 2.5 liters of fluid and eaten some noodles, freshly imported. Or something like that. Of to bed. 

Pink flowers and insanity

Pieces of a life

I strolled down the main street of Oslo one day, as I tend to do and suddendly I smelt this beautifull perfume. I've probably smelt it before but this time it struck me, and I fell in love. It does not matter in who, I just enjoyed the feeling till it came to an end and none of those pesky inconveniences that follow falling in love bothered me. I did after all not fall in love with anybody that could push those on me, I only fell in love with the smell. I've done it several other times after that and it keeps giving me the same pleasant tingling sensation.

I burned it again..... This of course means that I must learn to pay attention to my cooking when I make dinner. Though then again, the taste sort of grows on you. Which reminds me that I really long for homemade pizza...... REALLY.

Lan got drunk and fell on a fire....which is a really dumb thing to do. She lives to tell the tale though, no harm done. Got quite happy myself, it was not half bad.

I've changed my mind, the taste doesn't grow on you, it just tastes horrible. Such a waste throwing it away though. Hopefully the chicken tastes better................. It does.

Geta, good times and sun

Good days and spring. Noticed the lack of writing from me the last days? Well, the sun shines and I am in a swell mood. That's things that I don't write much about. But I will sort of today, or at least something realated and inspired by it. Because I walked through Oslo today, as I was on my way to a coffeeappointment with my cousin. Walking there, with my music in my earplugs and the sun in my back, I realized how different it all seemed from walking there the day before and I started to reflect on the city's different personalities. The sounds, the smells, the people. It is all a part of a city, and today they all went together and gave their most to making a beautifull day. It is no big deal, really, however it is amazing how such a seemingly unimportant thing can lighten up a day. Uhm, that is about all I'd like to share right now. Now everybody knows I'm not dead at least.

My way

But through it all, when there was doubt, I ate it up, and spat it out. I faced it all, and I stood tall, and did it my way.
Soon I'll be older..... one year, nah, doesn't feel like it. There, that is all I want to say about that as for now. I became happy once more today. All I seem to need these days are a few well placed words from some special someones and I'm suddendly on the boat for happyland. I don't mind though. I'm not a buddhist so ups and downs are expected. Now I finally got myself an up. If my trip to Japan also makes for an up, I'll probably have made up for having had such a downperiod the last year. Just now I'm watching tv, wondering if the kid in the commercial is really a boy or a girl. Now I'll drink again, I'm like a camel, goes long without drinking and when I first do, It's buttloads. Good night.

今日、アウデゥンさんとコーヒーを飲みながら、日本語で話をしていた。よかったね。まえより日本語を話すのがじょうずになったと思う。アウデゥンさんはしんせつだと思う。じゃあ。おやすみ。

The music of the night.

Movie-night yesterday. As so many nights actually. But this one was especially nice. Everyone there was for once really wanted (with the ecception of two guys showing up for the last 10 minutes of the film.) It is seldom I get to see a movie with people I find myself completely comfortable around, unless of course I see it alone or with only óne other person. I got to really relax for the first time in a long, long time. No more papers due, no more surprise tests, no more nothing. However the greatest thing about the day before this, is its end. She stayed over at my place.  If she is my queen I do not know, and I do not want to know yet either. For the moment she is just a girl I find very attractive and whose company I enjoy. No underlying intentions by the way. There is nothing that beats waking up with the sun in your face and a beautifull girl at your side. Goldie, she said her name was Goldie.

Missing

I tend to miss things. I guess it is a normal human condition, missing things and never really be satisfied with what one has. Right now I miss the past, long gone girlfriends, long gone friends, memories fading into the back of my mind. And I miss things that never actually happened, but that could have if I had played differently. It can't be healthy to miss all this and I should really stop. However I can't make myself. The dangers of missing all this is that one locks oneself indoors and tries desperately to relive things that has happened through photos and vidoes and such. Perhaps I should get out more, get myself some new experiences I can miss later on. One thing is certain, I do not find my queen if I don't leave this den of broken pasts. And then of course I think that I may have already found her, and given her up and I start to miss again... It is not supposed to be easy. Perhaps I am lucky and she finds me.... I can only wish. If you read this queen, promise you will find me ok?

ちょっとおちこんだ。今、食べたり、飲みたりしなくちゃいけないから、やめる。あとね。

Letters from Iwo Jima

I just noticed right now that the clock-thingy on this blog is rather inacurate, I have not calculated by how much, and come to think of it I don't ever want to find out. It feels somewhat comfortable to know that one never really can tell when I wrote what I did. Makes it independent of time. But it was not this I planned to rant about, no this was only a little digression. I was planning to praise Misted Eastwoods great movie "硫黄島からの手紙" or "Letters from Iwo Jima" as it is also called. I saw it for the second time again tonight and once again I was greatly touched by it. It is a very honest movie filled with humanity and feelings. Also it is one of the few American war-movies that tries to abandon the patriotism-consept on behalf of trying to show things from different sides. I think this is crucial for the movie's feel and spirit. One must however be warned that this is a very sad movie. Almost 20000 or so Japanese soldiers died on that island. This makes for 2 hours of loss and despair. However, it is a great movie, I shall not say how it ends or what happens so go se for yourself.

硫黄島からの手紙はよかっただ。かなしくなった。映画の音楽がとても好きだ。
これが一番好きだかもしれません。

Where does one find the antqueens?

I feel lonely. However my loneliness must not be seen as desperation, as many would have it to be. Nay I am not desperate to find myself a new queen. I simply just admit that I am longing for the feeling it gives. I went out with my brother and some of his friends yesterday. Saturday night life in Oslo. Sadness and loneliness walked with me and the thousands of people crowding the various nightclubs. They all seemed to be seeking that moment of happiness that an escape from everyday life could provide. A quick feeling og love and being appreciated. I enjoyed the dancing and the smiles for an hour or so before leaving for home. I get uneasy being alone in the center of falseness. The walk home was filled with starshine, good food and the beautifullness og being the only person ine the world. Well this sure sounded emo so I'll just round it up about now. Any ways, my point being that I enjoyed last night but I'm still no bar- og pub- or nightclub-man. And I do not wish my queen to be one of the 
people found there regularly either.

Life smiled

I woke up this morning with a smile on my face. It is a long time since the last time I woke up in such a great mood. And it is all thanks to my good friends. They made yesterday great. Since you are reading this I figure you wanna know what happened so I'll just tell.

Kenneth, one of my friends, had a party for the entire japansese class. Of course, not all of them showed up but enough to make it just right. And the guest of honor, Tami-sensei, also showed up to my, and everyone else's delight. We had singstar, we had wine, we had fun. I actually sang, what gives.... "Alice Cooper - Poison" and "Ronan Keating - Father and Son." Yes I know it was the wrong version of "Father and Son" but it was not as I could choose anything else. I lost to dansu-jin at "Father and Son" but won against Kenneth, however barely, at "Poison." And to top the night of I got some "possitive attention" right before I left for the final subway. Thank you ;) All this would have made any night good, but it still managed to get just a bit better as I met up with Emiko at the mailbox-place. She is so nice to talk to, and we did so for quite a while.

I do not know if this all qualified for a blog. However something as significant as me feeling quite happy and satisfied with life. Hmmmm.

昨日はとてもよかった。えみこさんとマリアさんのおかげだったんだ。
今日、私は嬉いです。みんなのおかげだった。

I woke up this morning...

So, as you probably all figured, I woke up this morning.
For some reason this is among the first thing I did, before even eating.
I don't even know what to write, or if I am going to write anything,
however it would be a total waste of time making this if I were not
to use it.... But I guess this will do as a test-run. And I really do need
that food I mentioned. Later then?

だれか日本語をわかりますか。私に書いてください。
私は日本語を勉強するし、日本語を練習しなくちゃいけないし。