Ughar in the evening

Only the oral japanese left now.... if I passed the written that is. Nervous, very nervous. Well, I've taken up FFXII again, partly to calm me down, partly cuz I won't have PS in Japan if I get there. I'm wondering what I might do if I actually fail, I've tried very hard not to get my anticipation up just in case, but it is damn hard when there is such a thing at stake. And even if I get my dreams fulfilled and get to go to Japan there's things going on here I'd rather not miss like my mom's 50th birthday. Who'd ever want to miss such a thing? So these days before I know for sure if I go or not are so loaded with contradicting feelings that I'm quite worried if I will burst or not.... Though something in me tells me that I did quite well on the exam, so perhaps the outcome is as expected? I'll have to admit that I halfway expect that I'll have no problems passing. I've allready achieved worse than I'd want myself to by having done bad enough to doubt whether I'll pass or not... My god I sound full of myself. I must eat something soon....