Missing

I tend to miss things. I guess it is a normal human condition, missing things and never really be satisfied with what one has. Right now I miss the past, long gone girlfriends, long gone friends, memories fading into the back of my mind. And I miss things that never actually happened, but that could have if I had played differently. It can't be healthy to miss all this and I should really stop. However I can't make myself. The dangers of missing all this is that one locks oneself indoors and tries desperately to relive things that has happened through photos and vidoes and such. Perhaps I should get out more, get myself some new experiences I can miss later on. One thing is certain, I do not find my queen if I don't leave this den of broken pasts. And then of course I think that I may have already found her, and given her up and I start to miss again... It is not supposed to be easy. Perhaps I am lucky and she finds me.... I can only wish. If you read this queen, promise you will find me ok?

ちょっとおちこんだ。今、食べたり、飲みたりしなくちゃいけないから、やめる。あとね。